


No Time Like the Present (Unless You Can Do It Tomorrow)

by hazelNuts



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, Dean is Bad at Feelings, Hurt Dean, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, POV Dean, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-02
Updated: 2017-09-02
Packaged: 2018-12-22 22:07:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11976009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazelNuts/pseuds/hazelNuts
Summary: After Cas becomes human, Dean tries really hard to make the change easy for him. Which includes not getting all those messy, complicated feelings involved, but Cas isn't having it.Cas is human now, completely and irreversibly. It didn’t happened by choice, Cas’ grace was ripped from him by a group of reapers trying to push Sam and Dean into the abyss of no return. Dean knows it’s not his, or Sam’s, fault, but he still feels guilty, and so responsible for Cas’ well-being. He helped Cas pick out clothes that are more comfortable than his old suit, is helping him figure out what his favourite tv shows and his favourite foods are, and whenever Cas needs to just sit and process things, Dean is his silent support. He’s even taken to eating extra vegetables in an attempt to show how to properly take care of a human body.





	No Time Like the Present (Unless You Can Do It Tomorrow)

**Author's Note:**

> If you think I forgot any tags, please let me know in the comments.

Cas is human now, completely and irreversibly. It didn’t happened by choice, Cas’ grace was ripped from him by a group of reapers trying to push Sam and Dean into the abyss of no return. Dean knows it’s not his, or Sam’s, fault, but he still feels guilty, and so responsible for Cas’ well-being. He helped Cas pick out clothes that are more comfortable than his old suit, is helping him figure out what his favourite tv shows and his favourite foods are, and whenever Cas needs to just sit and process things, Dean is his silent support. He’s even taken to eating extra vegetables in an attempt to show how to properly take care of a human body.

Contrary to his brother’s believes, he’s not an oblivious idiot. He’s never been good at expressing his emotions freely, or at appropriate times—they tend to just burst out when they become too overwhelming—but he’s not completely stunted. He knows that there’s more than just feelings of guilt at work here. He loves Cas. He’s _in love_ with Cas, and he’s pretty sure Cas feels something similar for him.

When he went to Lisa, after putting Lucifer in the cage the first time, he’d been a mess, grief overwhelming him at every turn, but he’d gotten better. Slowly but surely, room was made for other feelings. He tried to show his appreciation for her and Ben through little things, like cooking dinner and doing chores before they could even ask. He knew he would fall in love with her, would be able feel it and express it. But things went to hell again before any of that could happen.

Now he’s here with Cas, sitting on the couch, watching a sit-com, because they don’t really have anything else to do. Dean wants to say those three little words, thinks about them almost constantly, but he can’t yet. Cas is so new to all this; he deserves to adjust, to get comfortable in his new life, to not be distracted from figuring himself out.

‘Dean, we need talk about our feelings,’ Cas says, muting the television, and turning to look at him.

_Son of a bitch._

Even as he’s thinking that, Dean can’t help the smile that tugs at his lips at Cas’ bluntness. He’s not sure if it’s something that’s just _Cas_ , or if it’s something Cas started doing because he and Sam evade any hard questions that don’t come straight to point.

‘We will, just… Not now,’ Dean says. He means it. Mostly.

‘Why not now?’

_Because I’m scared._

_Because I don’t want you to make me a part of you before you know who you are._

_Because I’m not even sure who I am sometimes._

_Because I’m absolutely fucking terrified._

‘Because you’ve been human for barely a month now, and there’s more than enough time to figure out feelings once you’ve figured out how to be human,’ Dean says. It’s a lame excuse, and he knows it.

Cas squints at him, considering Dean’s answer, then nods and unmutes the television.

~

The thing about being a hunter is that you don’t have a lot of time. If there’s something you need to do, you gotta do it today, because you might not have a tomorrow. Which is why Dean is cursing himself and his cowardice as he’s lying on the ground next to an open grave, Sam pressing a shirt to scratch in his side. Cas is standing a couple feet away, keeping an eye on the bones and making sure they’re properly burned.

By the time the fire goes out, Dean can sit up by himself. The bleeding has slowed considerably, but he still makes sure not to move too much in case it starts up again. As Sam and Cas fill the grave back in, Cas keeps glancing at him, looks that are hard to decipher by the light of only a couple of flashlights, but Dean has a pretty good idea what Cas is trying to convey: they’re going to have a talk.

At the motel, Sam disappears to the office to get a room of his own. Dean doesn’t if it’s something he and Cas discussed or if this is one of those time where Sam’s brotherly instincts are at the wheel.

Cas steers Dean to their room, and all the way through to their bathroom.

‘I’m fine,’ Dean mutters after Cas orders him to sit on the toilet lid.

‘I can see that by the bloody shirt you’re pressing to the gaping wound in your side,’ Cas mutters darkly and completely unimpressed. He gently peels the bloody shirt off Dean’s side, then cuts away Dean’s own torn clothes.

The drying blood made his clothes stick to his skin, and Dean grimaces at the pinching, itchy feeling as they’re pulled off. He probably looks like a horror movie extra.

‘Dean, we need to talk,’ Cas says firmly, dropping the ruined clothes in the shower stall.

‘Okay,’ Dean sighs. He won’t be able to argue Cas out of it this time. He swallows, his heart already racing in anticipation.

Cas drenches a washcloth, then kneels next to Dean and gently cleans the skin around the wound.

‘I know you think that me being human now is hard for me, and confusing, and a little annoying. And you’re right, it is. It’s all of that. But I doubt it’s any more so than it is for other humans.’

Dean looks down at Cas for a moment, the cute frown between his eyebrows as he concentrates on his task. the messy hair, the plaid shirt Dean remembers buying for him; and then he thinks about what Cas just said and bursts out laughing. He winces when it pulls on his wound, quickly dialling it down to a chuckle.

‘You’re right. Being human is hard and confusing and annoying. I guess I just didn’t want to overwhelm you with more hard, confusing and annoying things,’ Dean says. It’s not the entire truth, but by the look in Cas’ eyes, he can tell Cas knows.

‘Dean,’ Cas admonishes him softly. He stops his cleaning and raises his free hand to press against Dean’s cheek. ‘Loving you is the easiest thing I will ever do.’

Dean leans into the touch. His throat feels tight, and he has some trouble clearing it before he can get the words out, ‘Right back atcha.’

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://fandom-madnessess.tumblr.com/).


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